A buddy of mine had a practice throughout faculty that began after we met my sophomore yr. On the final night time on campus, he would cease by my dorm at 2 a.m. and make me drop every little thing to take a stroll with him. He knew I might be up all night time packing. I all the time waited till the final minute to pack my stuff for the 21-hour automobile journey again to Texas. The primary yr I resisted the invitation: “Joe, I would like to complete packing. I’ve every little thing deliberate out to the minute in order that my stuff shall be on the curb able to go when my dad and mom come by tomorrow. I can not waste any time.” However like a great buddy, he insisted: “You haven’t any selection. It’s our final day on campus this yr. You’ll not get this second again.” I rolled my eyes at his sentimentality, however I went.
We walked from my dorm to the Clarke Memorial Fountain first, a conflict memorial that stood in entrance of the coed heart. “Cease,” my buddy insisted. Inserting his fingers on my shoulders, he made me pause and face the fountain and take within the sound of the dashing water. “Do you notice that this second proper right here is the final time you’ll stand in entrance of this fountain…” I virtually interrupted him to say we’d be again in entrance of it every day subsequent yr, however then he continued, “…as a sophomore at Notre Dame?” I rolled my eyes once more. “OK, Joe.” He simply smiled and invited me to take it in. Then we continued our journey.
We walked to a bunch of locations we frequented throughout the yr, and every time he repeated his instruction: “Cease, Gretchen. Look. Take all of it in. That is the final time you’ll be proper right here as a sophomore.” After an hour or so, he returned me to my dorm so I might end packing.
We repeated our final night time walks collectively every year after that. They have been each sentimental and stuffed with laughter and pleasure. One yr it rained, and he added to his script: “Do you notice that is the final time we are going to stroll within the rain and be lined within the mud of this campus this yr?”
I by no means forgot these walks.
I didn’t pause to soak in my faculty expertise a lot whereas it occurred. Actually, I’m not somebody who remembers to pause to soak in a lot of something. I’m consistently on the transfer till I’m asleep. I’m all the time doing one thing, considering one thing, creating one thing. Joe knew that and took it on himself to pressure me to pause at the very least yearly and see the sweetness and the blessing within the expertise. He pressured me to acknowledge the “lasts” in each second.
I’m wondering now, if I had solely acknowledged the lasts current within the moments like these with him final yr, would I’ve paused longer to soak them in?
Final month, a colleague and a buddy handed away. Jack’s presence round faculty was plain, and never simply because he was 6’8”. He was a continuing mentor for me over the previous 18 years. He had this behavior each time he noticed me strolling by within the hallway. Like my faculty buddy, Jack would place his fingers on my shoulders to get me out of my very own head and make me cease and take discover of the place I used to be and who was round me. “Don’t let it move you by, Gretchen,” he’d say. I’m wondering now, if I had solely acknowledged the lasts current within the moments like these with him final yr, would I’ve paused longer to soak them in?
As I enter now into the busiest a part of my semester, each Joe’s voice and Jack’s are constants in my head, reminding me to seek out the moments of pause. I really feel their fingers on my shoulders as they are saying, “Cease, Gretchen. Look. Take all of it in. This can be a second you’ll by no means get again.”
What if we acknowledged the lasts in each second? How would that change how we present up on the planet?
Photograph by Aron Visuals on Unsplash.
